Movement of Healthy Churches: Sign 7 – Strong Families

The strength of the Church is measured at home and the future of the Church begins at home. Ps Navin Ong expounds on the above values in this article.   

What makes a church strong? Is it the size of the congregation, the eloquence of its preaching, or the success of its ministries? While these are important, they are not the foundation of a truly strong church.

A congregation can have packed services and thriving programs yet remain spiritually weak if its families are struggling. Many families today face significant challenges. In Singapore, divorce rates are highest among couples married for five to nine years, largely due to financial pressures, career demands, and the busyness of life (Singapore Department of Statistics 2023, 16). Many Christian parents feel ill-equipped to disciple their children, and youth are increasingly disengaged from faith. According to the Institute of Mental Health (IMH), one in three young people in Singapore suffers from severe depression, anxiety, or stress (Teo, 2024). Many seek belonging online rather than in their own homes or churches.

If families falter, the spiritual foundation of the church crumbles. But when families are rooted in Christ, thriving in love, and united in mission, the church flourishes for generations. Family discipleship is not optional—it is essential. A strong church begins with strong homes.

But when families are rooted in Christ, thriving in love, and united in mission, the church flourishes for generations.

God’s Design for Family and Church

The first church was not a building or a program—it was a family.

From the beginning, God established the family as the foundation of faith. Marriage was designed as a covenant (Genesis 2:24), children were to be trained in the ways of the Lord (Proverbs 22:6), and faith was meant to be woven into everyday life (Deuteronomy 6:6–7).

The Apostle Paul affirms this in Ephesians 5 and 6, illustrating how a healthy family reflects Christ’s love: husbands are to love sacrificially, parents to nurture their children in faith, and children to honor their parents.

However, modern believers often assume discipleship is solely the church’s responsibility, with Sunday School and youth ministry as primary spiritual influences. This is a dangerous misconception. Discipleship begins at home. Generational ministries are not a substitute for parents — they are partners. When families embrace their role as the primary spiritual influence, faith becomes deeply rooted, authentic, and lasting.

Discipleship begins at home.

Threats to Strong Families

A spiritually weak family leads to a spiritually weak church. At the State of the Family Conference 2025 (Plenary #1 Who is the Missional Family? 2025), several key challenges were identified:

1. Financial and career pressures – High housing, childcare, and education costs create stress in young families, often leading to conflict. The pursuit of career success further compounds this, reducing family time and spiritual engagement. Long hours and packed schedules leave little room for meaningful relationships and faith formation.
2. Cultural and digital distractions – Modern culture reshapes how families define identity, truth, and purpose. Postmodernism questions absolute truth, making faith seem optional. Digital communities replace real-life connections, and rising exposure to pornography, extramarital affairs, and redefined marriage and gender roles erode biblical family values. Without intentional discipleship, social media and secular ideologies exert greater influence than the Word of God.
3. Lack of spiritual leadership at home – Many fathers prioritize financial provision over spiritual leadership. Without godly guidance, children view faith as a Sunday routine rather than a daily relationship with God. When parents fail to disciple their children, external influences fill the gap.
4. Program-focused churches – Churches often excel at pre-marriage counselling but lack ongoing support for couples. Many focus on programs rather than authentic relationships, leaving struggling families feeling isolated. Without strong marriages and families, the next generation risks disengagement and spiritual drift.

The Missional Family: A Light in the World

A strong family does more than survive—it shines.

Jesus calls His followers to be salt and light (Matthew 5:13–16). This begins at home, through daily faith practices. Conference panelist, Dr. Suzanne Choo, highlighted four key habits essential to building strong families:

• Observe – Stay aware of cultural shifts and stand firm in biblical truth.
• Converse – Talk about faith daily, not just on Sundays.
• Preserve – Model and protect Christian values, passing faith to the next generation.
• Serve – Use the home as a place of ministry and outreach.

When homes embrace their God-given mission, they don’t just protect faith—they pass it on.

Jesus calls His followers to be salt and light (Matthew 5:13–16). This begins at home, through daily faith practices.

What Church Leaders Must Do

If churches want strong disciples, they must prioritize strong families:

1. Equip Parents to Disciple at Home – Provide resources, workshops, and mentorship.
2. Strengthen Marriages – Offer marriage mentoring, counseling, and retreats, especially during the critical 5–9 year period.
3. Create Intergenerational Small Groups – Foster relationships between older and younger couples.
4. Address Cultural Challenges with Biblical Clarity – Discuss identity, sexuality, technology, and faith deconstruction to equip families with biblical wisdom.

A church that empowers families will not be shaken.

Practical Steps for Every Family

While churches provide support, every family must take responsibility for their spiritual foundation. Here are five key steps:

1. Make Worship a Family Habit – Read Scripture, pray, and discuss faith together daily.
2. Prioritize Conversations Over Screens – Talk about real issues instead of letting social media disciple your children.
3. Model a Christ-Centered Marriage – Children learn love, forgiveness, and faithfulness by watching their parents.
4. Practice Radical Hospitality – Open your home to others, teaching children what it means to serve.
5. Be Present and Intentional – Don’t let busyness steal the joy of discipling your family.

If parents and marriages are spiritually strong, the church will be unshakable.

Building a Church That Lasts for Generations

A strong church does not begin with great sermons—it begins with strong families. If parents and marriages are spiritually strong, the church will be unshakable. But if families crumble, the next generation of believers will be lost. We must stop assuming families will be okay on their own. Instead, we must fight for marriages, disciple our children, and strengthen our homes. When families are strong, the church is strong. And a strong church stands the test of time.

Bibliography

“Plenary #1: Who is the Missional Family?” 2025. Panel discussion at State of the Family 2025: Missional Families. Church of Our Saviour, 20 February, 2025.

Suzanne Choo, “How the Missional Family can Respond to Today’s Cultural Headwinds” in Plenary #1 Who is the Missional Family? 2025 at State of the Family 2025: Missional Families. Church of Our Saviour, 20 February, 2025.

Singapore Department of Statistics. 2023. Statistics on Marriages and Divorces, 2023. Singapore: Singapore Department of Statistics, Trade and Industry, 2023. https://www.singstat.gov.sg/publications/population/marriages-and-divorces

Teo, Joyce. 2024. “Depression, Anxiety, and Stress: 1 in 3 Youth in Singapore Reported Very Poor Mental Health, Says IMH Survey.” The Straits Times, September 19, 2024, https://www.straitstimes.com/singapore/health/depression-anxiety-stress-1-in-3-youth-in-s-pore-had-had-very-poor-mental-health-says-imh-survey